“The only real treasure is in your head. Memories are better than diamonds and nobody can steal them from you”

Hello.
I've been MIA from this blogging world and believe me, this time it was not because I have nothing to say. It was the other way around. A lot has happening in my life and this magical whirlwind is kind overwhelming me. I want to say a lot of things but also I want to say nothing. 

This time I want to share about my feeling towards some of my memories. What is memory? memory is something remembered from the past. A recollection of events that has been saved in your brain and can come up anytime you allow them to. There are good memories and bad memories. They can come up and haunt you anytime. Not only in your sleep but also when there's something that reminds you about those memories. I believe something become a memory because those things are stored in your brain as something special. That is why it can easily comes up especially when it's a good memory.

From the past week I experienced some events in my life that become quite memories to me. I still can't decide though if it's good or bad memories. Because when I remember them, I can feel really happy, wonderful, and sometimes can't believe that all those things happened but also really glad that all those things happened. But I'm confused as to why something like that only exists in my memory now when I know it could easily happen again in real life. What's the difference? I feel like I'm in twilight zone, and sometimes I feel so thankful to the person who gave me those memories for me to reminisce but also I want to strangle him because he gave them to me only to leave me confused as to why all those things happened then and can't happen now. You're probably really confused because I speak rather cryptically but I just want this to never become a problem to anybody but mine. Because those are my memories and even though there's someone who give them to me, I know that it's probably something that is not relevant to him or just something that is not worth remembering but obviously it's not the case for me. I still can go back and recall every single thing that happened in detail. Maybe because those things are stored in my brain as something special? I don't know. But do I really want to remember them as something special? probably.

In the end I feel like I should really be thankful for those memories. Because at least it happened once and I can still hold on to those things as long as I want to. Because memories are only for you to keep and nobody can steal them away from you. Maybe I should also be thankful to the person who gave them to me. It was unforgettable. You know who you are. Or not. Whatever. Bye.

Tata, xx

(For those who wondering the quotes on the title of this post is from Rodman Philbrick)

My personal therapy

In a serious need of a new journal.
Blog is great but I can't always post stuff in here because I don't always connect to internet, I still love the feeling of using gel pen and paper, and the last, sometimes I want to write something that is just too personal to type in here. It's not like I have so much reader on my blog or anything. Oh well you get me. Anyway there is just so much stuffs that I want to write but I have no journal because the last one is full already.

If you don't know, I've been writing on a journal since I was a kid. My first diary was when I was in 3rd grade elementary school and I still have it until now. The cover of my first ever diary is F4 or what you called Fantastic four. You remember them? That's right. Meteor Garden. Hahah. I got it from my teacher as a gift because I got the first rank in class. It started out as a silly thing. I would write about these random fact about my self and also about all my friends and their random facts. And as the time progressed, my writing turned out into something more personal. Like when I was having a bad day or when I was annoyed with one of my friends or even when I had a crush on someone. After that, writing on a diary or journal has become my thing. I was always have a diary so when I had something to tell I could always write.

Now, writing have become one of my personal therapy. Some girls find shopping as their therapy when they are having a bad day but I would just lock my self in my room, listening to my playlist and then write. It's not like I don't like shopping because I do. But not as much as the frequency of a shopper to the point that you call me shopaholic. Nope. I would just write. I would write about almost everything that happens in my daily life. My diaries are my secret keeper and the best part is they won't ever tell. Not only my personal therapy but writing is a hobby to me. I'm not only writing about my personal life. Sometimes I write about global issues that is interesting for me. Sometimes I write poems and short stories. I tried several times writing lyrics but it didn't really end up well so I stopped haha.

One day I wish I could become a writer and would find my own book on a shelf in the bookstore and have people tell me that my book is inspiring or I hope help them in some way. Just like some writers helped and inspired me with their book.