Shit happens

The moment when you realize that you weren't supposed to say something.

The moment when you completely hate your self because of it.

The moment when you just wish you could turn back the time.

So yeah I did something stupid. Or say something stupid actually. Happens to me a lot honestly and I have no idea why. Like when I thought I should never say something but I said it anyway because I thought "Meh, I'm just messing around, no big deal, no one's gonna care" but then boooom something happened and my words were being interpreted completely different than I was intended to then I was like "shit! That is not what I mean" but the most annoying part is when I couldn't say anything because I don't know how to explain it. So yeah I'm just sitting here completely out of my mind. Frustrated. Confused. And hating my self. I know being like this is not going to help me. It's not going to change the fact that I'm wrong again. But you should know the feeling of being hopeless. That is what I feel right now. Like I don't know what to do. What to say. What to expect from this. I. JUST. DON'T. KNOW. One thing I do know though, my words will be hold against me. Tonight, I'm hoping for all the things that is holy that something that I think is going to happen is not going to happen but if it happens then I just have to suck it up, have a good cry, try to forget it and move on because shit happens. And this is life.